Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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