my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
