okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
