At least make sure they are 18
Why
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
