I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She's the barista slut.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
It all started with a game of naked twister.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
