No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize