it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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