I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
