what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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