Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
