school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
