Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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