I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize