I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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