Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize
