Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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