She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
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