Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
