I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
