Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
foreskin is a definite game changer
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
