ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
