I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
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