I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
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