why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
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