it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
