it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
you would pick up someone in the library
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
