i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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