PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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