My room smells like vodka and shame
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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