I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
