They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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