She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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