I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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