Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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