2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
A bitchslap is in order.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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