Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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