just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
