I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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