your room smells of hookers.
And success
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Randomize
