Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize