I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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