Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
