Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
