Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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