It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize