What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
