ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
