so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
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