My friends, they love my intelligence
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
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