Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Randomize