what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
