Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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