well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
